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18 Funny Adult Sms and one Liner (+18)

  Funny SMS » You are here
1. What do politicians & porn stars have in common?

They are experts in switching positions in front of a camera!

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2. The Blue Whale ejaculates over 40 gallons of Sperm when Mating. Only 10% enters the female. And you always wondered why the sea tasted Salty?!

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3. Great door signs:

Gynecologist: Dr Jones at your cervix.

Septic tank truck: Yesterday's meals on wheels.

Plumber's office: We repair what ur husband fixed.

Tire shop: Invite us to ur next blowout.

Electrical shop: Let us remove ur shorts.

Maternity room: Push, Push, Push.

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4. Man Teases his ex-wife's new husband: So, dude how was the second-hand stuff?

New husband: Not bad. After the first 3 inches, she was brand new.

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5. Prof teaching muscle movement, asks a lady: Do you know what your asshole does when you have an orgasm?

Lady: Sure, he's at the office, working!

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6. Similarity between a dick & matchstick?

Both have heads without brains, both flare up at slightiest friction, both fizzle out after showing valour for 2secs !!!

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7. Santa on long tour asks Banta 2 inform if anything unusual haoens at home.

Banta SMSs after a month: Man who comes 2 Screw Ur Wife daily, didnt come today.

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8. Why is a woman's pubic hair curly?

So that it won't poke a man in the eye!

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9. Why is sex similar to shaving?

Well, because no matter how well u do it today, tomorrow u hav to do it again.

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10. A hillarious spelling mistake behind a truck, saying: Put deeper at night!

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11. Russian: Sir we got a huge order from usa for 16 inches condoms. I think it is to embrass us.

Boss: No problem! Complete the order and mark them SMALL SIZE.

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12. What is Fashion Designing?

Too many brains working on too little clothes with too many ideas on how to cover two little areas.

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13. Teacher: What do u know about Sensex?

Pappu When we have sex with Riya Sen, Raima Sen, Rimi Sen, Konkana Sen & Sushmita Sen etc. it's called Sen Sex!

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14. Girl: Xcuse me brother, that's my seat.

Boy: OK! But I'm not ur brother, my father never fucked ur mom.

Girl: True, but my father did !

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15. A football team loses their star player, Roger Dicks, due to an injury.

Next day a headline reads: Team to play without Dicks.

The manager calls up the newspaper and objects, so the editor changes the headline. It reads: Team to play with Dicks out.

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16. Todays generation: Six year old boy to a four year old boy: Dude, I found a condom in the balcony.

Four year old boy: What’s a balcony ?

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17. What's the difference between a thin prostitute and a counterfeit note?

One is a phony buck and the other is a boney fuck

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18. The young couple were holding hands in the Nudist camp.

Guy: When I tell you I love you why do you always lower your eyes?

Girl answered shyly: To see if it's true




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