Non Veg SMS Jokes Collections

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Santa Banta Swimming Pool Me Naha Rahe the.
Santa Dubne Laga, to us ne Banta Ki Lulli Pakad Li.
Banta: Bhosdike Tairna Seekh,
Ladki K sath Hota to dub Jata!

 

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Wo pyar hai mera imtihan kyu legi.
Milegi nazro se nazre toh nazar jhuka legi.
Use Meri kabar pe diya mat jalane dena,
Nadaan hai wo "MERI GAAND” jala degi...

 

 

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College Shayarii Competition

Boy- Humey toh apno ne luta,
gairon me kaha dum tha,.
Meri kashti thi dubi waha,
jaha pani kam tha...

Girl- Tum to ho hi gandu,
tumhari gand mein kaha dum tha.
Waha kya apni maa chudane gaye the,
jaha pani kam tha...;-)

 

 

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3 days before wedding Santa goes to a
prostitute for sex. She bites his penis.

He visits doctor who puts dressing all
around his penis with tape.

On 1st nite wife says:
Lo ji pesh hai Ekdam Fresh & Unused Pussy...

Santa:
.
.
Tu fresh ki bat karti hai,
yeh dek aaj tak packing bhi nahi kholi!!:)

 

 

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Ladke waley ladki ka haath kab maangtey hain..??
.
.
Ans-
Jab ladka apney haath se thak jata hai-
      / /l     (
  c(,,,)       )
         l     /

 

 

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Girl To Doc: Doc, i took an i-pill by mistake...

Doc: Now get fucked as much
as you want within 72 hrs,
else your money will get waste..!!

 

 

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Interview 4 Personal secretary
Boss- Wat is d Difference Between
Key & Panty ?
A sexy gal replies -
Key -
Insert & Open
Panty -
Open & Insert

SHE IS HIRED

 

 

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Vatsyayan wrote in KAMASUTRA that sex is:
1. DUTY if done with your wife.
2. ART if done with your lover.
3. EDUCATION if done with a virgin.
4. TUITION if done with your teacher.
5. JOB if done with your secretary.
6. SCIENCE if done with a fertile lady.
7. BUSINESS transaction if done with a whore.
8. SOCIAL WORK if done with your neighbor.
9. CHARITY if done with a widow.
10. SACRIFICE if done with your own hand

 

 

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John: Ur secretary is vry sexy
Joe: Thnx, it’s a robot.
Her name is Pinky.
If u squeeze her rite breast, she takes dictation
& u squeeze the left, she types.
I'll lend it to u for a day & u can see for urself
Nxt day John called Joe from hspital:
U BASTARD,
u didn't tell Pinky's pussy is a pencil sharpener..!!

 

 

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Santa 2 girl: Wtz ur name?
Girl: Carmen.
Santa: wt kind of name is dat?
Girl: coz I lyk Cars n men, so i am Carmen. Wtz ur name?
Santa: CHUTINDER SINGH BOOBIYA..!!

 

 

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Roye hum is kadar unki baahon me lipatkar...
Roye hum is kadar unki baho me lipatkar..
.
.
Ki wo khud B-R-A utaarkar boli...
LE Dudh PeeLe ab mooh bheech kar..!!

 

 

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Rape case:

Wakil- Kya tum use zanti ho zisne tumhra Rape kiya?
Girl- wo koi bahar ka tha

Wakil- Tumhe kaise pata?
Girl- Itna bada LUND mohalle me kisi ka nhi hai.

 

 

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A newly married man was standing
in front of a mirror naked and was
admiring his physique.
'2 inches more & I will be a king.'
Suddenly the wife comes in and says,
'2 inches less and you will be a queen!'

 

 

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How 2 Satisfy A Woman-
Cares, Excite,
Cuddle, Fascinate,
Kiss, Rub, Tease,
Pamper, Console,
Respect & Love her.
How 2 Satisfy A Man-
Jus Giv Him A Blow Job

 

 

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You can be a DOCTOR & SAVE lives
You can be a LAWYER & DEFEND lives
You can be a SOLDIER & PROTECT lives
OR
.
.
REMAIN A FUCKER & CREATE LIVES..

 

 

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Wife husband ka lund pakad k Boli-
Mere Lal,
Mera sona,
Mera Baccha uth jana.
Husband-
.
.
.
.
Behan ki lodi isko chut Me lena hai,
ya school Bhejna hai.




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  Posted on Saturday, August 20th, 2011 at 1:46 PM under   SMS | RSS 2.0 Feed