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The Japanese have produced a camera that has such a fast shutterspeed it can take a picture of a woman with her mouth shut
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Most people are only alive becauseit is illegal to shoot them.
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Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.
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Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks
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Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else.
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A day without sunshine is like, night.
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For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism.
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Good judgment comes from bad experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
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If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
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Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.
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Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
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The shortest distance between two points is under construction.
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When there’s a will, I want to be in it.
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Tags: funny one liner, One Liner, one liner jokes
