A. Read technical books

Q. What do you call it when a desi tries to imitate an American ?

A. Artificial Intelligence

Q. What does a desi's intelligence say to his man-hood ?

A. You are a fictious character.

Q. Why do desis go to a bar ?

A. To stand in a corner and look at the blondes on the sly.

Q. Why is it good to have a desi friend ?

A. You can get your assignments done.

Q. What is a desi's favorite rhyme ?

A. Earn money. look funny. (like a zombie, having spent a lifetime

in the lab)

Q. How do you make a desi's eyes light up ?

A. Wave a dollar bill on his face.

Q. What is a desi's most exciting part of life ?

A. Doing an assignment for a girl.

Q. Why do desis drink a can of beer ?

A. so they could get high.

Q. Why do desis wear underwears ?

A. Because they could have wet dreams.

Q. What do desis do for lovemaking ?

A. Read penthouse.

Q. What do you call a desi between two blondes ?

A. A misfit.

Q. What do you call a desi's brain ?

A. A conundrum.

Q. How does a Professor change a desi's mind ?

A. Offer a RA.

Q. Why do desis like spicy food ?

A. To avoid constipation.

Q. Why do desis wear goggles ?

A. To look at blondes

Q. What do desis mean by fun ?

A. sighting blondes sitting in a car with sun glass doors.

Q. What do you call a desi gathering ?

A. Techinical conference.

Q. When does a desi smile ?

A. After seeing his pay check.

Q. When do desis go to the temple ?

A. Just before the finals week.

Q. Why is Cinemax's (cable) Friday after dark so successful ?

A1. Because, all desis watch it.

Q. Why does warner cable show X rated movies ?

A. Because desi's won't pay otherwise.

Q. Why are blue films made ?

A. So desis know what sex is all about.

Q. Why do desis drown in a swimming pool ?

A. Because they have pot bellies.

Q. What does a desi do on a date ?

A. Bore the hell out of the girl's mind by talking about his

assignments and how he solved the problems.

Q. What is a desi's most exciting night ?

A. Sitting alone in the lab and reading Alt.sex

Q. How can you punish a desi ?

A. Ask him to talk to a girl without offerring to do her assignment.

Q. Why don't desis wish other desis ?

A. Because, they are scared the other might ask for a quarter.

Q. How do you confuse a desi ?

A. Ask him questions about sexuality.

Q. What is the desi's chronic speech impediment ?

A. His accent.

Q. What do you call a desi who says he dated a blonde ?

A. A braggart.

Q. What do you call a desi girl who isn't beautiful yet stupid ?

A. Piddle shit

Q. How do you identify a stupid desi ?

A. Give him some money and see if he doesn't look gratified.

Q. How does one desi confront the other ?

A. By playing chess.

Q. How does a desi measure his perseverance & stamina ?

A. Watch all the X-rated movies shown on a friday night and still

feel no sexual urges.

Q. How does a desi confuse another desi ?

A. Speak with an american accent.

Q. What are desis famous for floating in the swimming pool ?

A. Because of their strikingly prominent tummies.

Q. How do you excite a desi ?

A. Give him a book about the Theory of Relativity.

Q. Why are desis cockeyed ?

A. Because, they never look at a blonde straight.

Q. How do you describe a desi ?

A. A short zombie who looks intimidated.

Q. Who do you call a smart desi ?

A1. One who can drink two cans of beer and still walk straight.

Q. What is a desi's philosophy of life ?

A. Eat, sleep and study.

Q. Why are desis immune to STDs ?

A. Because they never have sex.

Q. Why does a desi buy a condom ?

A. To add to his collector's items.

Q. How does a desi bragg ?

A. Tell fellow desis that a blonde smiled at him.

Q. What is the difference between a priest/nun and a desi ?

A. The latter has no choice but to stay a virgin.

Q. What do you call a stupid desi ?

A. A techinical fault.