Hilarious Joke's Sms Collection

  SMS You are here
Views: 2153

Happy July Kyuki 823 Saal Baad
Aisa Pehli Baar July Ka Mahina
Aya Hai Jisme;
5 Sunday
5 Monday
Aur
5 Tuesday Hongey....

##########################################################

 

You Used To Stole My Memories I Excused
You
.
You Stole My Laugh I Excused You
.
You Stole My Smile I Excused You
.
But This Is Too Much.. Mere Dogie Ka Biscuit Wapas De.....

##########################################################

 

Barber Said-'Baad Me Aao, Busy Hu',
Den D Ghost Said Somthng N D Barber Fainted.
.
.
"Sar Rakh Kr Jaa Rha Hu, Cutting Kr Dena,
Baad Me Le Jaaonga.

##########################################################


Ab 50 K Rchrg Pe Paye:
#Rs.9999 Ka Tlktime,
#80 Yrs Ki Vlidity,
#All Cals 0.01ps/Hr,
#5 Lac Sms Free
4 More Dtails Visit:
www.Ja Tu Apna Alag Tower Lagale.com

##########################################################

 

Santa Opend New College, But
Students Are Confused To Take Admission.
College Name: ' Santa Medical College Of
Engineering For Commerce And Arts.

##########################################################

 

Law Of 'Sab Kuch Upar Se Gya' States Dat-
"Whatever Be The Topic N Whoever Be The Teacher,
Knowledge B4 The Lecture & After D Lecture Always Remains Constant".

##########################################################

 

16 Yrs...
(.)=(.)
25yrs...
( . )=( . )
36yrs...
( . )=( . )
Kya Soch Rahe Ho??
Zyada Sms Paroge Toh
Itna Bada Chashma Lageyga..
Samjhe!

##########################################################

 

Wife: Kuchh Saal Pehle Mera Figure Pepsi Ki Bottle Ki Tarah Tha...,
Husband Bola: Wo To Ab Bhi Hai,
Bas Pehle Bottle 300ml Ki Thi,
Ab 2ltr Ki Hai..!

##########################################################

 

Just Feel D Lines...
Na Dekh Aasmaan Ko Itni Hasrat Se Ae Dost
Kisi Parindey Ne Mooh Pe Potti Kardi Toh
Saari Hasratein Dhari Ki Dhari Rehe Jayengi....

##########################################################


It's Very Nice To Discuss Problems With Friends,
Not Because That They Will Solve It,
Par Kaminey Aisa Gyaan Denge Ki Problem Bhool Jaoge....

##########################################################

 

What Is Dahej?
Jab Koi Ladka, Kisi Ladki Rupi Musibat Ko
Jiwan Bhar Jhelne Ke Liye Taiyar Hota Hai,
Toh Usey Di Jaaney Wali Protsahan Raashi
Ko Hi Dahej Kahte Hain....

##########################################################

 

Ek Sher Arz Hai:
Hui Barsat Aur Ladki Bhig Gayi,
Waah Waah
Hui Barsat Aur Ladki Bhig Gayi,
Waah Waah
Phir Kya....
.
.
.
Ham Ne Phoonk Maari Aur Wo Sukh Gayi.

##########################################################

 

Height Of Shock..

Bf- Plz Give Me A Kiss..
Gf- No... After Marriage
Bf- Dont Worry,
I M Already Married..

##########################################################

 

Superman Bhi Gaaney Sunta Hai..??
What Is Superman's Fav Song?!?!
.
.
.
.
.
Hawa Mein Udta Jaaye Mera
Laal Duppata Malmal Ka!!

##########################################################

 

"Super Bezzati...:
Girl- (In A Party) Excuse Me,
Mere Haath Me Plate Hai Toh Kya Aap Mere Face Par Se
Ek Cheez Hata Saktey Ho?
.
Boy Khush Hotey Huye- Haan Bolo Kya Kya Hatana Hai?
.
.
Girl- Apni Kuttey Jaisi Nazrein....

##########################################################

 

Girls Marks In Computer: 99/100-
.
.
Don't Know How To Turn On Computer Properly
.
.
Boys Marks In Computer: 44/100-
.
.
Knows To Hack Computer....

##########################################################

 

Father: Raat Ko Tum Pee Ke Room Me Gir Gaye The.
Son: Kya Batau Papa Sab Galat Sangat Ki Wajah Se Hua.
6 Dost,6 Beer.
Aur
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Unmey Se Saaley 5 Peete Hi Nahi....

##########################################################

 

Boys K Liye Kamyabi Ka Funda:

Apni Zindgi Me Koi Kaam Karney Se Pehle
Humesha Kisi Ladki Se Mashwara Lena
Aur
Wo Jo Mashwara De, Uska Ulta Karna
Kamyab Rahoge....

##########################################################

 

Aishwarya - Abhishek, Mujhey Kuch Khatta Khaaney Ka Munn Kar Raha Hai.

Amitabh- Arey Hajmola Khao... Mai Brand Ambassador Hoon.

Abhishek - What An Idea Sirjee....

##########################################################

 

1 Class Ka Bacha Apni Miss Se Puchhta Hai
"Mai Aapko Kaisa Lagta Hoon?"
Miss: So Sweet!
Bacha: To Phir Mai Apne Ammi Abbu Ko Aap K Ghar Kab Bhejun..?
Miss: Wo Kyon?
Bacha: Taaki Wo Hamari Baat Aagey Chalayen..!
Miss: Ye Kya Bakwaas Hai..!
.
.
.
Bacha: Tution Parhane K Liye..
.
Always Think Different,
Do Differen....

##########################################################

 

Ladka: Mere Us Jagah Haath Lagao
Jahan Haddi Naa Ho..
.
.
Ladki Muskratey Huye: Chal Phir
Nikaal Bahar, Pakdu Teri
..
Zubaan Ko.
.
.
Moral: Mere Message Gandey Nahi
Hotey...!

##########################################################

 

Teacher Is Sentence Ko English Me Bolo;
"Dhobi Ka Kutta Naa Ghar Ka Naa Ghaat Ka...."
Student- Washerman's Dobeman Niether
Housing Nor Bank River....

##########################################################

 

Malinga Ki Maa: "Beta..!
Haircut Karaane Chal !!"
Malinga: Kyun Maa ?
Maa: Purane Pital Ke Bartan
Dhoney Ke Liye Scruber Chahiye..!!

##########################################################

 

Chitragupt Yamraj Se Boley : Maine Ek Aisa Software
Banaya Hai Ki Jab Bhi Dharti Pr Kisi Masoom Pe
Attyachar Hoga To Swarg Mein Ek Blast Hoga..
Achanak Ek Ke Baad Ek Bahut Saarey Blast Honey Lagey..
Yamraj Ne Pucha Ye Kya Ho Raha Hai.......?
Chitragupt:- Lagta Hai Engineering Ka Result Aa Gaya.....

##########################################################

 

A Girl's Facebook Status:
"Travel Led In Bus After Long Time"
Commnts:
1) Awww, So Sweet..!!!
2) May Be Nextime Will Go Together Sweetie...!!!
3) Wow, I Want To Experience It..!!!
4) You Went Without Me..?:(
5) Wonderful Dear..!!!

A Boy's Facebook Status:
"Travelled In Bus After A Long
Time.."
Commnts:
1) Haan Toh Harami Hum Kya Karey..?
2) Bas Yehi Teri Aukaat Hai.!!
3) Kamine Ab Auto Mein Bhi Jayega
Toh Status Update Karega Kya..??
4) Baap Ko Bol Kam Se Kam Cycle Lekar Do..!!!
5) Usi Bus Ka Conductor Ban Ja Kuttey..
6) Ticket Kharida Ki Nahi Bhikhari?

##########################################################

 

Police Wala Or Fauji Ek Saath Train Me Safar Kar Rahey The.
Policewaley Ne Time Pass Ke Liye Fauji Se Puchha,
“Ap Chutti Pe Ja Rahey Hain?”
Fauji: “Haan Biwi Ki Delivery Hai, Isliye”
Policewala: “Ohh Achha, Kitne Din Baad Ghar Ja Rahey Ho?”
Fauji: “2 Saal Baad.”
Policewala Uska Mazaak Udaatey Huye: “Phir To Honey Wala Bachcha Pakka Haraam Ka Hoga”
Fauji Ne Badey Pyar Se Jawab Diya: “Mujhe Konsa Ghar Rakhna Hai, Saley Ko Police Me Bharti Kar Dunga..

##########################################################

 

Girl's Version-
.
First Day: I Saw An Idiot
Sleeping On The Front Bench..
.
Second Day: Saw The Same Idiot
Getting Punished..
.
Third Day: He Was Fighting With
A Boy..Uhh..Idiot ..!
.
Fourth Day: I Couldn't Find Him...Where Is
He...


Boy's Version
.
First Day: When I Opened My
Eyes...I Saw Her...Her Smile..
.
Second Day: I Got Punished So
That I Could See Her All The While..
.
Third Day: A Boy Said Sumthin About Liking
Her So I Fought To Him
.
Fourth Day: I Was Sitting On The
Last Bench..
'N She Turned To Find Me...!?!
'N We Smiled..:)

##########################################################

 

1 Din 1 Ladke Ko Uska Tchr
Kehta H- Kal 3 Fruits K
Naam Learn Krke Ana..

Ldka Uncle Se- 3 Fruit Batao.
Uncle- Teri Bakwass Ke Liye
Mere Paas Time Nhi H.
Ladka Likh Leta H.

Ladka Bhai Se- 2 Fruit Batao Bro-
Grlfrnd Ka Phone A Rha H Jladi
Dfa Ho Yha Se.
Ladka Likh Leta H.

Ladka Apne Padosi Se- 1 Fruit Bta.
Padosi- Tu 1 Pagal H.
Phir Likh Leta H.

Agle Din;
Tchr - Yaad Krke Aya?
Ldka- Yes.

Teacher- Sunao.
Ladka-Teri Bakwas Ke Liye
Mere Pass Time Nhi H.

Tchr- Time Nhi H ?, Chal Principal
Ke Paas.
Ldka-Grlfrnd Ka Phone A Rha H Jladi
Dfa Ho Yha Se.

Tchr Tuney Mujhe Samaj Kya Rkha H
Studnt- Tu 1 Pagal H.

##########################################################

 

Talwar Baazi Ke Muqabley Me.

1 Chinese Ne Baal Ke 2 Tukdey
Kr Diye
.
1 Japnis Ne Udti Hui Makhi Ki
Gardan Kaat Di
.
Rajnikant Ne Machar Udaya.
.
Talwaar Ghumayi.
Par
Machar Udta Hi Raha.
.
Japnis: Machar To Ud Rha Hai
.
Rajnikant Muskurate Hue Bola-
Udd To Raha Hai, Par Kabhi Baap Nahi Ban Payegaa..




Latest Posts

  Posted on Thursday, July 19th, 2012 at 5:35 AM under   SMS | RSS 2.0 Feed
Start Discussion!
(Will not be published)
(First time user can put any password, and use same password onwards)
(If you have any question related to this post/category then you can start a new topic and people can participate by answering your question in a separate thread)
(55 Chars. Maximum)

(No HTML / URL Allowed)
Characters left

(If you cannot see the verification code, then refresh here)